Playing football for Kennoway Hearts from under 16′s through to under 21′s was about the most enjoyable time of my life. Among other things I met my wife when we had a team Easter trip to Butlins in Ayr. I also met some great people that I remain good friends with today.
One of the highlights of our training was when local professional, Stevie Kirk one time Motherwell but by this time Falkirk, came to take charge of the session. He would do this 4 or 5 times a season.
On this particular session there was a young lad blasting about the park on what can only be described as a WWII motorbike! This wasn’t all that unusual at Cotlands park Kennoway. Stevie often had to shout out the instructions to be heard above the racket of this bike and you could tell he was a little p*****d off. So while the bike was out of earshot he gave us out instruction for a running exercise which was to sprint diagonally from one corner of the pitch down to the other jog across the goal line then sprint diagonally back up and repeat. This was to be done until he decided we’d had enough. Pre season eh.
So Stevie walked down to the bottom of the pitch to get us started. As we waited at the corner of the pitch team joker with the well earned nickname Willie “Donut” Lindsay shouted over the guy on the bike and explained his near genius idea. He was going on the back of the bike and when Stevie Kirk said go the bike was going to appear from the middle of our crowd of players and reach the bottom of the pitch in record time. As I said near genius.
So with us all giggling like hell at this ridiculous idea Stevie Kirk shouted “GO”. The crowd of us parted ready for the WWII motorbike with Donut on the back to accelerate past us.
But as we parted and started to sprint diagonally down the pitch the un-named bike rider stalled the bike!!! We by this time were in hysterics and were half way down by the time the bike eventually got started. As we got 3/4 of the way there the bike and Donut hurtled past us with him well chuffed to now be winning. Stevie Kirk wasnae happy.
This is where Donuts genius really went tits up. The bike rider lost control at the bottom of the pitch and couldn’t turn or brake! Donut leapt to his safety, burning his leg on the exhaust as he went and the guy and his WWII bike hit the wall! We got to the corner in time to see Donut writhing in pain with a decent sized leg burn and Stevie Kirk shaking his head with a statement often heard at our training at this time “for f***s sake Donut”
Willie Donut is still a good friend now and still one of the funniest people I know and felt this is a story I had to share as its genuinely one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen.
Alex Stevenson
Read Alex's blog at http://eckstevsonblog.wordpress.com
and Follow on Twitter @eckstevson
Memory added on April 5, 2013
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